What Kind of Fool Am I?
by StephanieWithAnA
Summary: Pacey/Joey season 1 smut 1 parter


**What Kind of Fool Am I?**

****Pacey froze as the bushes outside his window rustled. He pressed pause on the VCR remote and held the remote up to protect himself. The odd noise continued, as he set poised to bash in the brain of whichever dumbass had stupidly decided to burglarize the sheriffs home.

"Who's there?" he asked in a hushed whisper. "Just so you know...I'm armed."

Large, brown eyes peered through the window. "With a VCR remote?" she scoffed. "Oooh...I'm scared."

Pacey scowled as he rested the remote on the nightstand and watched her clamber inside. "You lost?"

She dusted herself off quickly, peeling a dirty sock off her shirt as she did. "This place is disgusting. How can you live like this?"

"I'm sorry I didnt clean up, Potter. Oh wait," he paused dramatically, pressing his finger to his temple. "I didnt invite you here so it doesn't matter."

Joey firmly planted both hands on her hips and glared at him. "Whats wrong, Pace? Your fantasy woman turn you down tonight? Or did Ms. Jacobs finally find someone her own age to screw?"

"Again I ask, are you lost? Because I think you can see by now that Dawson isn't hiding out here."

"I'm not looking for Dawson," she said quietly as she sat down on his windowsill.

Pacey crossed his arms over his chest and smiled widely. "Oh I get it...you two had a fight. What was it this time? Was it your obvious disapproval of the blonde bombshell or something much more serious...like say the fact that he hasn't noticed you've got breasts now?"

"Shut the hell up," she seethed. "I don't what I was thinking coming here."

"Neither do I," he agreed quickly as she moved to the window again. "Ever since...oh I don't know...you got your period, you made it quite clear that you cant stand being around me. If I didn't hang out with Dawson, I'd probably never see you."

"That's not true," she argued.

"What's not true? You mean you haven't had your period?" he teased.

"Of course I..." she began. "How would you even know?" she asked in exasperation.

"Three sisters, remember?" He paused and focused his attention back on the television screen, which was still paused. "Besides, for as much as you hate me, you still have to admit that I have much more experience when it comes to these things."

"What things?" she asked quietly as she settled back on the sill again.

Again he glanced at the VCR, knowing that he didn't have long before the pause would run out. He reached for the remote on the edge of the nightstand, only to have Joey snatch it away. "Hey!"

"You didn't answer my question, Pacey. What things?" she reminded him.

He looked away from her just as the VCR started playing again and the sound of moaning filled the room. "That," he replied, pointing to the screen. "I was talking about sex."

Her face contorted uncomfortably as she watched the couple on the screen pull each others clothes off. "This is sick."

"Yet you continue to watch," he was quick to point out.

"Bite me."

"Come a little closer," he suggested, smiling. "It's fine with me if you wanna watch, but I think you'd be more comfortable if you weren't perched in my window."

She snarled at him and slowly moved toward his bed. "When was the last time you changed your sheets?"

"The last time I dreamed about you," he said confidently.

"Oh that is sick! Did you really think I needed to hear that?" she demanded.

"Do you really think I meant it?"

She glanced at him and shrugged her shoulders. She inspected the bed for any strange looking stains and in finding none; she sat back on his pillows. "Any body home?" she asked casually as the realization set in that getting caught watching porn in Paceys bed ranked pretty high on the embarrassing scale.

"Why?" he asked as he leaned closer to her. "What did you have in mind?"

"Down boy," she ordered as she swatted him with the remote.

Pacey rubbed his wound for a moment before asking, "You hungry? Because I was gonna make me a turkey sandwich."

"No, I'm good," she replied absently. The movie had her full attention.

"Okay, Jo," Pacey laughed as he left the room.

Pacey reached into the refrigerator and retrieved the items he needed for his sandwich. He sighed deeply as he thought about his admission to Joey. He really had had a dream about her, the kind that caused him to do his own laundry. It had thrown him for a loop. It wasnt odd to have those dreams but the star was usually a porn actress or whatever girl he'd been crushing on that week. But when he dreamed about Joey, something clicked. He'd been looking at her differently. He'd been noticing her smile, her eyes, and the way they spoke to each other. He was beginning to wonder if under all the hostility that went on between them, if there was something more going on.

He quickly shook his head. It was ridiculous to think that Joey would ever look at him the way she looked at Dawson. No, he was the buddy. They'd obviously been having a fight and it was his job to reassure her and send her back to Dawson.

To send her back where she belonged.

He sighed quietly and cleaned up his mess in the kitchen. He returned to his room to find Joey still engrossed in the video. "Heads up," he called as he tossed her a soda.

"Thanks," she scowled as she barely caught the can.

Pacey took a bite of his sandwich and turned to face her. "You know, as much as I'm enjoying your company, I still need to ask what brought you here."

"Do you want me to leave?"

"No."

"Because I can go," she replied, her voice rising. "Just because I don't want to go home, doesn't mean I need to be here with you. Especially when you don't want me here."

"It's not that," he argued softly. "Just tell me what's going on."

She stood up and moved toward the TV. She shut it off and then turned to face him. "You were right. Dawson and I did have a fight. But it wasnt for the reasons you named."

Pacey stuffed another bite of sandwich into his mouth and waited. "Are ya gonna make me guess?"

She sighed emphatically and tossed the VCR remote on the bed. "We were fighting about sex," she said finally.

Pacey nearly choked. "You two were gonna...I mean you wanted to..."

"No, no. I asked him a question about sex, which led to a fight, which led to me storming out."

"What was the question?" Pacey asked curiously.

Joey turned her back on him and sat on the edge of his bed. "I asked him...I asked him what an orgasm felt like."

"You what?" Pacey spat. "Did I hear you correctly?"

"Yeah, you heard me."

"You do realize that Dawson is the last person you need to be going to with sex questions, right?"

Joey spun around quickly. "And who would you suggest...you?"

"No, I wouldn't suggest me," he replied honestly.

"Then who?"

"What about your sister? Why couldn't you..."

Joey held her hands up. "Bad idea, Pacey. If she knew that I was thinking about sex, she'd ground me until I was 35."

"Oh. I guess that goes along with the protective-older-sister-vibe, huh?"

"Exactly," she agreed as she sat back down on the bed, this time facing him. "And throw into it that she wants me to go to college and not to be tied down with a baby like she is."

"Thats understandable, I guess." Pacey finished off his sandwich and tossed the napkin into the garbage. "I guess you don't exactly have any girlfriends to ask either."

Joey chuckled. "Yeah. Who knew that spending the majority of my formative years with two boys would render me without a single female friend to speak of?"

"Well, I may not be the best person to answer your question, but I could try," he offered.

"Why wouldnt you be the best person?"

Pacey circled around the bed and sat down on the floor. He faced her and after a moment, he looked up at her. "It feels different for a guy. I'm not a woman. I have no idea how it would feel for you."

Joey slid down the end of the bed and glanced away for a moment before asking, "So tell me how it feels for you."

Pacey raised his knees to his chest and sighed. "Have you ever been on a roller coaster before?"

"Pacey...I'm being serious here."

"So am I," he argued. "Now answer my question."

"Of course I have."

"Okay, then you have a good idea of how it feels to have an orgasm."

"I don't understand."

Pacey pressed his lips together and thought for a moment. "Getting to the point of climax is like going up the roller coaster. There's this force and of course an unbelievable amount of anticipation. You know it's going to happen. When you get to the top...when you finally get there," he waved his arms animatedly, "Its amazing."

"Can you be more specific?"

"There's this moment where you totally let go. And after its happened, then you start to fall. That's the rush. The waves just pound through you. They make your whole body shake. For girls, well you know, your," he paused and nervously pointed to her crotch, "your walls contract and pulse."

"And you can feel that?" she asked skeptically.

"Oh yeah," he said nodding. "Sometimes that's what pushes me over the edge."

"I see," she stated slowly, her brow furrowing.

"Still confused?"

"No...I guess not. I guess," she sighed, "I guess I'll never know what it feels like."

"Of course you will, Jo," he said reassuringly as he reached for her hand.

Surprisingly she accepted his touch. She glanced down at their entwined hands and smiled. Warmth spread through her as his thumb rubbed circles over her skin. "Haven't you ever...touched yourself like that?"

Joey pulled her hand away and shook her head. "No. I knew that Dawson had...that's why I asked him."

"Are you sure hes done that before?"

"Yeah. He told me he did. But when I asked him to explain to me how it felt...God, he blew a gasket."

"And you really don't get why, do you?"

"No...should I?" she inquired slowly.

He smiled disarmingly and shook his head. "Dawson doesn't really see you as a girl...a woman," he corrected. "To him you're just another one of the guys, just a buddy and that's it."

"Like I care," she replied dismissively as she glanced away.

"No, that's just it, you do care."

"What do you know?" she scowled as she moved away from him.

"I know a lot," he replied angrily. "All these years that I've been friends with you two, I've learned a thing or two. You really think he's gonna talk to you about sex? No, he can't. Because once you have that conversation, then you're no longer his little Joey Potter and he can't handle it. He wants you to play the friend role, just like I'm supposed play the role of his loser friend who constantly screws up so he can look better. We're all just actors in a life scripted by Dawson Leery. Can't you see that, Jo?!"

A horrified look crossed Joey's face as she glanced down at his hand, gripped tightly around her arm. "Let me go," she demanded calmly.

Pacey snatched his hand back like it was on fire. "I'm so sorry," he mumbled.

"Maybe I should leave," she said softly as she stood.

"Yeah," he agreed as he pulled his knees back up to his chest and rested his head on them.

She glanced back at him and couldn't help wondering what his tirade was really all about. "Do you wanna..." she began.

He raised his head slowly, his eyes pleading. "If you wanna stay...I promise I'll calm down. You just caught me at a bad time."

She knelt beside him, her long hair brushing over his bare shoulder as she found a comfortable place to sit. "What's going on?"

Pacey swiped at tears that threatened to fall. "It's my dad." He chuckled dryly. "It's always my dad."

"What did he do now?"

"It's what I did. See, evidently I'm such a pathetic loser that he couldn't take me to this dinner tonight. His family was invited of course, but he couldn't risk being embarrassed by his youngest son. They're all there together and I'm here...with you," he paused to look into her eyes, "but you don't even want to be with me. I'm supposed to tell you that everything's gonna be swell and send you back to Dawson. Fucking Dawson. He's so damn blind. He doesn't see you. Not the real you. And yet you love him...don't you?"

"I don't know. I don't really know anything right now," she whispered.

Pacey wrapped an arm around her and sighed. "I know how that feels."

Joey stiffened as he touched her, but soon gave in. She nestled against his chest and smiled when she felt him smelling her hair. "What do you see?"

"Right now...I see the top of your head."

Joey raised her head and smiled. "No, you goofball. You said he doesn't see the real me. Do you?"

"Yes."

"Tell me then. Tell me how you see me. Please? It means a lot to me," she begged.

"Joey...no, I can't. Let's just drop this," he replied, pulling away from her.

She immediately missed his protective arm around her. "I don't wanna drop this," she challenged as she pressed his legs down and straddled his lap. "And I'm just gonna have to keep sitting here until I get what I want."

He glanced up at her, needing to focus somewhere else besides her breasts, which were now right in front of his face. "Get off me, Jo."

"No," she said, smiling widely. "You can't say all that stuff to me and then...nothing. Come on, Pace...elaborate."

She raised her hands and placed them firmly on his shoulders, but he immediately pulled them down and held them behind her back. "You don't wanna play this game with me, Jo."

"Maybe I do," she replied as she wiggled in his arms. "Just tell me what you think about me. I promise I won't make fun of you."

Pacey crossed his legs under her and pulled her body even closer to his. He stared right into her eyes as he asked, "You really wanna hear this? Because once I say it, I can't take it back."

She licked her lips and nodded, suddenly speechless and left wondering if it was their close proximity that had left her this way.

He nodded in response, loosening his grip on her hands as he did. "I think you've changed. I can't exactly remember when I noticed but I thought one day that you were really turning into a woman." He noticed the corner of her mouth turn up and before she could start putting herself down, he added, "Unlike our friend, Dawson, I did notice that you got breasts...nice ones in fact. Your hips are filling out and I like the way they sway when you walk."

Joey nodded and smiled. "Anything else?"

"Your legs have a nice shape. I used to think they were kinda bony, but they look nice now. And of course, your lips."

Joey touched a fingertip to her lips and asked, "What about them?"

He brushed her finger aside and replaced it with his own. "They're so full. Your lips look adorable when you pout. And they seem...they seem like they'd really be soft." He traced the outline of her lower lip with his finger as she gazed down at him with heavy-lidded eyes. When her lips parted and the very tip of his finger came in contact with her wet tongue, he could feel his cock straining against his shorts.

Joey let her eyes fall closed as she sucked his fingertip. She bucked against him and her eyes flew open when she felt his hardness under her. "Pacey..." she said nervously.

He gripped her hips and tried to push her away. "Sorry about that."

"It's okay," she replied softly as she looked down at the bulge in his shorts. "Did you make it do that?"

Pacey glanced away nervously. "It kinda has a mind of it's own."

Joey trailed a hand down his chest and sighed, "So it doesn't have anything to do with me?"

Pacey gripped her wrist as her hand dangerously neared his waistband. "It has everything to do with you, Jo. You're turning me on."

"I am?" she asked innocently as she pulled her hand from his and stroked his erection through his shorts.

"What are you doing?" he asked almost painfully, not having the strength to stop her.

"I'm curious. I wanna see what it will do," she told him as she moved her hand back to his waistband and prepared to feel him with no barrier between them.

"Jo..." he argued weakly as she straddled one leg now and tried to get him to lift his hips.

"Can I see it?" she begged in a voice so sweet, he was powerless to refuse her.

"You sure?" he asked as he peered deeply into her eyes.

"Yes," she breathed as she slid his shorts carefully over his erection and down to his knees. She kept looking at him as she wrapped her hand around it. She saw how his eyes fell shut and a small smile crept across his lips as she stroked him. "Is this right?"

"Oh God yes," he moaned as he bucked against her hand. "If you don't stop soon...oh my God...I'm gonna..." he warned.

Joey ground against his muscular thigh as she felt liquid heat pool between her legs. She leaned forward and whispered into his ear, "Do you really want me to stop?"

"No," he gasped. His head fell back and she finally took the opportunity to look at the pulsing flesh she held in her hand. She could see the clear liquid leaking from the tip. He was so warm and hard and responsive. She hadn't planned to take it this far, but she wanted more. She wanted him to come...and she wanted to be the cause of it.

She bucked her hips, no longer caring if she was getting his leg wet. She was unbelievably aroused and in need of her own release. "Jo..." he warned again as his orgasm approached.

Joey quickened the pace, stroking him faster, needing to make him climax as much as she wanted her own. "I want you to come," she breathed softly.

That was all it took. Pacey lifted his hips right off the floor and pumped right into her hand. His cock grew impossibly harder and then finally his release. He helped her angle it down so that it went on his own leg instead of on her. He moaned loudly as his orgasm shook his body violently. "Oh my God...Joey...yes," he hissed when it took hold.

She watched with rapt fascination as the warm cream spilled from the tip of his cock. She liked the way his face contorted and an odd smile took over. "Was that good?" she asked teasingly.

Pacey nodded quickly, gently pulling her hand off of his quickly fading erection. "Do you even need to ask?"

"Yeah," she replied softly as she watched him wipe up the mess on his leg with a towel he'd found under the bed. "People do fake, ya know."

Pacey laughed heartily as he tossed the towel aside. "Women fake, guys don't. Remember that."

"Okay," she replied, still panting a little.

He pulled up his shorts, feeling a little self-conscious. "Now what about you?"

Joey moved off of him and wrapped her arms around herself protectively. "What about me?"

Pacey shifted his body around and approached her slowly. She leaned back on her elbows, keeping a safe distance between them. When his body was just above hers, he gazed down at her and asked, "Isn't there something I can do for you?"

"Do?" she echoed nervously. "I don't..."

Pacey urged her to lie back as he moved beside her. "Come on, Jo. You can't tell me that you're not just a little worked up. I felt how wet you were...on my leg, remember?"

"I'm fine," she lied. She glanced away as he lowered his face to hers. Her nipples were straining against her tank top and her breathing was labored.

"So you wouldn't want me to..." he offered as his hand smoothed over her stomach and trailed between her legs. "I wanna make you feel as good as you made me," he whispered gently against her neck.

Joey stilled his hand as his fingers tiptoed up her inner thigh. "Pacey...don't."

"What's wrong?" he breathed softly as he raised his head to gaze at her.

"I'm scared," she replied honestly as she looked into his ocean blue eyes.

He swallowed hard and shook his head. "You're not scared of me, are you?"

"No," she smiled reassuringly. "But I am afraid that I won't be able to...that I can't..."

"That's for me to worry about, Potter," Pacey smirked as his hand slid down the front of her shorts.

"Okay," she gasped as her eyes fell closed.

As his fingers dipped lower and sought out that sensitive spot below her curls, he spoke softly to her, coaxing her into a relaxed state that would allow her to enjoy the pleasure he wanted to give her. He asked her along the way if it felt good, if he should go faster or slow down. She responded to his questions with sighs and moans. Her legs opened wider little by little until he could finally slip a finger inside her. She tensed at first, feeling very unsure, but he stroked her clit softly until her tenseness subsided.

"It feels so good," she moaned as her eyes opened and she found him staring down at her.

"Good," he sighed as he lowered his lips to hers.

She raised her hand to his chest as thoughts of pushing him away invaded her mind. Even with all the activities they'd been engaging in, to her a kiss was more intimate than all of that. But the moment his mouth met hers, she melted into his arms. Her hand snaked behind his head and pulled him deeper into the kiss. Her tongue slid along his lips, parting them and begging for entrance.

Pacey applied more pressure as he rubbed the heel of his hand against her clit. He sunk his fingers deeper inside her, searching for that special spot that would send her over the edge. As one of her hands tangled through his thick hair, the other grasped his wrist roughly, urging him on. She lifted her hips off the floor, bucking wildly against his hand.

So close to release, she tore her lips away from his and gasped for air. "Oh my God," she cried as the tingles began to climb up her thighs. It felt as if a volt of electricity shoved her as she teetered near the edge. Her whole body shook as the orgasm seized her. Pacey continued his ministrations, wanting her to get every ounce of pleasure she could. Her walls throbbed around his fingers as her silky wetness covered his hand.

He stilled his hand and stared down at her as he waited for her reaction. He was still half-expecting her to clobber him in the head for what had just happened. But her smile said otherwise. "So did I lie?" he asked gently as she gazed up at him.

"About what?" she replied as she gasped for air.

"About how it feels...a rush, huh?"

"Yeah," she muttered as she adjusted her clothes and scrambled away from him. "I need to use the bathroom," she said quickly as she stood and left the room.

"Okay, Potter," Pacey replied, completely bewildered.

Pacey sat up in his bed, his back propped against a pile of pillows. He'd showered in his parent's bedroom and changed into a clean pair of boxers. He was beginning to worry about Joey. She'd been in the bathroom for quite a while and he was starting to think that she wasn't going to come out.

"Hey," she said softly as she entered the darkened room. "I took a shower and I was just wondering if I could borrow something to sleep in."

"Of course," he replied quickly as he moved to his dresser. He pulled out a pair of boxers and an old t-shirt. "This okay?"

"That's fine," she said, nodding. Pacey couldn't help but notice the shy smile on her face as her eyes refused to meet his. "I'll be right back," she told him as she left the room again.

Pacey nodded and moved back to his bed. Once he'd gotten comfortable again, she reappeared in the doorway. He took in the sight of her. She'd pulled her wet hair up into a messy ponytail and he thought that his clothes had never looked better. "Tired?" he asked as he pulled the comforter back invitingly.

She cocked her head to the side and considered his offer. "Can we talk first?"

He nodded as a sense of dread took over. "Of course we can."

She walked around the bed and joined him under the covers. She sighed emphatically as she searched for the right thing to say. "It's just that..." she began.

"I get it, Jo," he said softly, his voice full of sadness.

"What?"

"You're gonna tell me that this was a mistake. That regardless of what happened, it doesn't change how we feel about each other and most importantly, it can't happen again."

"Are you done?" she asked only mildly irritated.

"Yeah," Pacey nodded.

She narrowed her eyes at him and shook her head. Just as he was about to ask her what was wrong, she leaned forward and planted a searing kiss on his lips. She grasped his broad shoulders and moved to straddle his hips. Her tongue plunged into his mouth and her hands explored the muscular planes of his body.

"Jo?" Pacey questioned in a gruff voice when she finally pulled away.

"What I was gonna say was," she paused as she nestled comfortably in his lap. "I hope that this doesn't change things between us because regardless of what you think, we are friends and I want it to stay that way.

"Friends...yeah," he agreed uneasily.

Joey cupped his face in her hands. "That's not a bad thing, Pace. And who knows? A few years down the line, it may be you that I'm head over heels for."

"Yeah right, Potter," Pacey teased as he pulled her hands from his face and wrapped his arms tightly around her. "Maybe when you work through your dramas with Mr. Leery?"

Joey buried her head in the crook of his neck and sighed. She smiled when she realized that she'd forgotten all about Dawson. "Are you sleepy?" she asked coyly as she raised her head and brushed her lips against his ear.

Pacey squeezed his eyes shut and willed his erection to go away. "Jo...we can't."

Joey peered up at him, her disappointment was evident. "Why? Is your family gonna be home soon?"

He nodded slowly. "That...and you don't want your first time to be like this...with me...here.

"Are you sure?" she challenged. "Why wouldn't I want my first time to be with you?"

"Because you don't love me," Pacey replied.

"And regardless of how you're feeling now, or what arguments you may have, you do want your first time to be with someone you love."

Joey opened her mouth to argue with him, but she knew he was right. She shifted her body so that now she was lying beside him with her head resting on his chest. "I guess you're right," she admitted softly.

"I know I am," he replied confidently as he wrapped his arm around her. "You come and see me in a few years and if you still want to, then I would gladly be the man who takes Joey Potter's virginity."

Joey giggled as Pacey held her tighter. "I'll try and remember that."

"And besides, Jo. You don't want your first time to be in this filthy room of mine. No. You should have the best. It should be in a beautiful room with a giant bed...and a roaring fire. How's that sound?"

Joey peered up at him and smiled. "It sounds perfect."

Pacey leaned over and switched off his bedside lamp. "Night, Jo."

Joey remained silent for a moment and then in her softest voice she said, "Thanks, Pace."

He smiled into the darkness and then buried his face in her hair. Breathing deeply, he sighed, "Anytime, Potter. Anytime." 

The End


End file.
